The 3Lunches introduction in London started with a bistro lunch in Knightsbridge. The guests were all women with a variety of backgrounds: a journalist, a former Vogue fashion writer and designer, a financial executive and the owner of a PR company – all bb (before babies they explained). None of the women were working at the moment and after much conversation about kids, husbands and boyfriends, I took a few moments to explain 3Lunches.

 

“That sound fabulous,” said the columnist, “but I don’t know if we’re up for this coaching thing. It seems very American.”

 

I explained that coaching was simply friends helping friends with suggestions and strategies.

 

“Oh, we do that, already,” the fashion writer/designer said. “We always help each other with our troubles.”

 

I offered that all 3Lunches did was formalize the process, and get the help focused for the benefit of the person who needed assistance.  It was goal-oriented.

 

“Ah,” the financial executive said. “That’s very American, too…that ‘goal’ thing.”

 

We discussed the process a bit further and to the woman, they were supportive, but doubtful about the British peoples’ ability to open up and ask for help.

 

The lunch conversation proceeded along in other directions, and I listened to stories of this one’s troubles, that one’s difficulties and what my lunch companions were doing to help these friends who were struggling with a variety of issues. I realized that offering to help a friend wasn’t an American thing – it was international.  We might use different words, but I think all people naturally want to help a friend sort through their troubles.  And everyone feels good when their advice has been valuable to someone in need. 

 

We Americans are goal-oriented, and perhaps a bit more open about our lives; I will concede those observations to my London friends. But being available to a person in need is a universal impulse.